The other day I was talking to one of the other ladies in the office. The conversation ranged all over, but when I mentioned that I was newly married she got a concerned look on her face and said, "Wow, how old are you?" I responded that I was 23 and my husband 22. She proceeded to tell me that her divorce was just finalized. She was married at 22 to a man who claimed to be "born-again" (she mentioned this because I mentioned that I am a born-again Christian). Despite the fact that she had told her ex-husband that she was Buddhist, they both decided that religion would not play a part in their marriage. It didn't take long for her to realize that he was a lazy drunkard (those are her words) and she filed for divorce. She is now 26 and determined not to get married again. She also was really scared to offend me by things she was saying.
I've thought about that often as I've gotten to know this woman a little better. Sometimes I think how hard it must be to be married and divorced by the age of 26. Most times I think, why in the world would this guy want to marry a woman who didn't share in his faith? And then after he married her, how could he profane the Name of the Lord by living the way he did? Not only has he pushed this woman away from Christ, but he has made it that much harder for anyone to be a Christian around her. What was he thinking???
But then I catch myself. I catch myself thinking I would never do that. And I realize, I may already have pushed someone away from Christ. If I haven't, I'm sure that I will at some point because the simple fact is, I'm still a sinner. I still choose the wrong, even when I know the right thing to do. I am not perfect and won't be for as long as I'm living on this earth. I am not above doing exactly what this man did.
So I ask myself, how am I different from any other person in this world? From those who don't know Christ as their Savior, I can say that I am truly blessed to have the Holy Spirit living inside me, giving me the ability to choose to do what honors God. I have forgiveness by the blood of Jesus Christ and I know that I will be in heaven when I die because of His atoning death on the cross and resurrection from the grave. I will not gain salvation by bringing food or clothing to the homeless or by donating money to charities or by being a good person. These things mean nothing in the face of a Holy God who can see right through my "good" deeds. I am forgiven of all my sins by God's amazing grace! Every day I should be humbled by these truths and so many more from the Bible. Every morning I should awake and praise God that I do not live in fear of death. I live knowing that this world is not my home. No matter what happens to this body, my soul will live on in heaven, praising Him for all eternity. What an amazing thought!
Yet I'm still left with some questions. How will I live my life today to show that I am different? How will I show that Jesus Christ does make a difference in my life? Will I work hard for the glory of God rather than to obtain more things? Will I maintain joy in the face of trials? Will I praise the Lord when He gives much or little? Will I be generous and loving to those who have great physical need? Will I be equally loving to those who seem to have everything together, but lack the one thing that really matters?
I wonder sometimes how non-Christians see Christians. Do we appear as though life is easy and things are always good? Do we come across as judgmental, always pointing a finger at someone doing something wrong? Do they see love in our eyes when we realize that there are so many in this world who are perishing and don't know or don't care? Or do they see pity, pride, arrogance? Are we just voices in an angry crowd or do we truly know how to live the lives that Jesus told us to live--the life He modeled for us?
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